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June 22, 2016

Letterman’s Top 10 Reasons to Vote Democrat

#10. I vote Democrat because I love the fact that I can now marry whatever I want. I've         decided to marry my German Shepherd.

#9. I vote Democrat because I believe oil companies' profits of 4 percent on a gallon of gas are       obscene, but the government taxing the same gallon at 15 percent isn't.

#8. I vote Democrat because I believe the government will do a better job of spending the       money I earn than I would.

#7. I vote Democrat because Freedom of Speech is fine as long as nobody is offended by it.

#6. I vote Democrat because I'm way too irresponsible to own a gun, and I know that my local       police are all I need to protect me from murderers and thieves. I am also thankful that we       have a 911 service that gets police to your home in order to identify your body after a       home invasion.

#5. I vote Democrat because I'm not concerned about millions of babies being aborted so long       as we keep all death row inmates alive and comfy.

#4. I vote Democrat because I think illegal aliens have a right to free health care, education,       and Social Security benefits, and we should take away Social Security from those who paid

#3. I vote Democrat because I believe that businesses should not be allowed to make profits       for themselves. They need to break even and give the rest away to the government for       redistribution as the Democrat Party sees fit.

#2. I vote Democrat because I believe liberal judges need to rewrite the Constitution every few       days to suit fringe kooks who would never get their agendas past the voters.

      ... And, the #1 reason I vote Democrat is because I think it's better to pay $billions$ for oil       to people who hate us, but not drill our own because it might upset some endangered       beetle, gopher, or fish here in America. We don't care about the beetles, gophers, or fish in those other countries.

"The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits."... Albert Einstein