Mullet Over
In case you have been wondering

By James K. White | April 15, 2009

Do you have the same fondness (spelled “terror”) for visits to dentists that is popular in many households? A company in Florida claims to have developed a near miracle blend called SMaRT that can be swabbed onto patients’ teeth only once and provide protection against tooth decay for the remaining lives of treated patients. “No cavities and no tooth decay” – that sounds splendiferous – and good.

Pluto recently suffered planet humiliation when it was declared to be no longer a planet but henceforth would be dubbed a “dwarf planet.” The disgrace continues for poor Pluto because the newly designated dwarf planet is not even the largest dwarf planet. That distinction goes to dwarf planet Eris which is about 8 billion miles from the sun. Eris even has a moon (Pluto has three).

I have been assured by someone smarter than I (such people are plentiful) that the South American bird known as the teratorn is most certainly extinct. That information should make hiking in Argentina, etc. a more pleasant pursuit; the teratorn was a meat eater and some specimens had wingspans that exceeded 25 feet (approx. 17 cubits).

The nation that possesses the greatest quantity of fresh water per human inhabitant is Iceland. Although much of the water is frozen, scientists estimate that there is at least 609,000 cubic meters of the precious liquid for each person in Iceland. Oil rich Kuwait is fresh water poor with only 10 cubic meters per human therein.

The magazine with the largest paid circulation is AARP Magazine. USA Today is our nation’s number one selling newspaper and Wall Street Journal is listed at number two.

“In God We Trust” has been on various U.S. coins since 1864. The Geiger counter was invented in 1913. I have no idea how people counted Geigers prior to 1913.

In case you have been wondering, the big noise labeled as “sonic boom” that results from a jet plane breaking the sound barrier is not heard by the jet’s pilot. In 1953 Jacqueline Cochran became the first woman to fly faster than sound.

The largest U.S. fresh water reservoir is a result of Hoover Dam and is called Lake Mead (Nevada). When full, the lake exceeds 130 miles in length.

I should imagine that selling air cooling equipment in Antarctica would be a tough job. The highest temperature ever recorded on the continent has been a rather mild 59 degrees Fahrenheit. Well, just to be safe, watch out for teratorns and have a grand week.

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Tell me this won't happen to me – Part II

Old friends
Two elderly ladies had been friends for many decades. Over the years, they had shared all kinds of activities and adventures. Lately, their activities had been limited to meeting a few times a week to play cards.

One day, they were playing cards when one looked at the other and said, “Now don't get mad at me. I know we've been friends for a long time but I just can't think of your name! I've thought and thought, but I can't remember it. Please tell me what your name is.”
Her friend glared at her. For at least three minutes she just stared and glared at her.
Finally she said, "How soon do you need to know?"

As a senior citizen was driving down the freeway, his car phone rang. Answering, he heard his wife's voice urgently warning him, “Herman, I just heard on the news that there's a car going the wrong way on Interstate 77. Please be careful!”
“Heck,” said Herman, “It's not just one car. It's hundreds of them!”

Two elderly women were out driving in a large car – both could barely see over the dashboard. As they were cruising along, they came to an intersection. The stoplight was red, but they just went on through.

The woman in the passenger seat thought to herself ‘I must be losing it. I could have sworn we just went through a red light.’"

After a few more minutes, they came to another intersection and the light was red again.
Again, they went right through. The woman in the passenger seat was almost sure that the light had been red but was really concerned that she was losing it.

She was getting nervous. At the next intersection, sure enough, the light was red and they went on through.

So, she turned to the other woman and said, “Mildred, did you know that we just ran through three red lights in a row? You could have killed us both!”
Mildred turned to her and said, “Oh! Am I driving?”